Giving Thanks

I got this quote today in my inbox from the daily Fast Company First Impression: "Showing gratitude is a key interpersonal skill - I see it as a leadership skill." Someone named Ruth Sherrman said that.


I've been noticing lately how weak I am at expressing gratitude. I tend to thank people after the fact instead of in the moment. I also tend to say "thank you" as I'm walking away from people- after my back is turned. I believe, but I may be kidding myself, that I used to be better at expressing gratitude than I am now. I'm not sure why this is slipping these days. It's certainly not because I don't feel grateful, I definitely do. I think it may have something to do with either my own poor attitude about work in general or perhaps I'm just becoming more like the culture that I inhabit.
It's sort of like joining a household that practices certain customs that are strange to you....after a while you become like them. They don't become like you.

I've been noticing that some pretty significant acts of service go unthanked in our office - mostly by supervisors. Support staff and middle managers seem to express gratitude toward one another openly- the senior management does not.
We had an executive team meeting today and no one thanked anyone for more than 2 hours. It was remarkable to discuss so much work without ever giving thanks to anyone.

Recently, someone anonymously left something on my desk called an "office angel." It's a little ornament looking thing with a note attached to it that says "You have been an angel to someone. Pass this on to someone who has been an angel to you." Today I passed it on anonymously to someone else. How much better would it have been to have personally told this person that I have been blessed by their act of kindness or generosity? Why is it anonymous?

I suppose it's better than not acknowledging the act at all......It just seems unnecessarily impersonal. I think that's a key to turning an attitude of gratitude into real encouragement for another person. It must be personal. For instance, I can feel grateful for you as a member of my team and send out a general thanks to all the staff for their hard work, but if it's not expressed directly to you personally, it just doesn't carry the same effect.
I've always known this. I wonder why I've stopped practicing it as much.